It’s always a bit strange when a big publication chimes in on a subject they don’t normally approach. But, variety is the spice of life, after all, and magazines are dying all around us. So why not approach the difficult topic of stopping snoring, right? At least this is the thought of the GQ publication: it’s obviously an important thumbs-down-gqtopic, as more people snore than voted for Donald Trump – so why not put a hat into the ring? Why not help out the readers that are sawing logs and waking up wondering if they got any sleep at all last night?

And one would think the information would be better, but as expected, it’s a little fluffy, even for GQ’s 10 Ways To Stop Snoring. I mean:

2. Sleep on your side.
Air turbulence is generally the fault of the soft tissue in the roof of your mouth, uvula (the flappy droopy thing), and pharynx (the back of your throat). If you sleep on your back, gravity pulls all these things south. Side-sleepers have a better chance of avoiding this problem. To train yourself sideways, pick up something called a wedge pillow. There are also shirts with tennis balls on the backs, to make rolling that way super-uncomfortable.

Isn’t really what I would call, ahem, really mind-blowing advice for snorers. Let’s be real… our mothers have told us this for years. “Sleep on your side, and all will be fine.” Hilariously, the link they include is to buy a pillow. My thoughts on this are here. Now, let’s be honest. If you are reading this article, you probably understand that sleeping on your side ain’t no solution at all. Why not try sleeping upside down? At least that sounds plausible and new (if absurd).

Oh, but the sages at GQ are not done. They have more mind bending research:

6. Free your nasal passages.
Especially if you’re sacked with seasonal allergies. Take a pre-bed hot shower, for the steam. Squirt in some saline. (This is also achievable through a device called a ” neti pot,” which is a traditional Chinese phrase meaning “fire water into your nose twice a week.” “It’s a very odd experience,” says Breus, underselling it, “but it irrigates things.”) You can also try nasal steroids like Flonase and Nasonex, but be aware they take 7 to 10 days to take effect.

Yep. They went there. It’s important that everyone take a moment to soak the previous passage in. Now, it’s also important to remember that in most cases, snoring HAS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH your nasal passages. Absolutely nothing. Like, nada.

If people snore daily, it is very unlikely to be a “congestion problem”. I write about nasal snoring here, but do understand that it is nowhere near the main problem for most snorers.  Hell, even the American Rhinologic Association doesn’t seem to be very passionate that snoring is mainly nasal. But, is there perhaps some kind of motivation why GQ would even mention nasal congestion as a snoring cause? Well, our answer does come in the form of…

7. Paste hilarious-looking strips on your face. Yeah they look silly, but do you want to quit snoring or not? Breus warns, though, many people apply breathing strips too high. “Take your thumb and forefinger, and start at the bridge of your nose. Breathe in, and slide the strip down, stopping right where your nostrils flare out.” They don’t always work, but there’s no harm in trying.

Oh yeah. They went there. Breathing strips. The statement “they don’t always work, but no harm in trying” does portray exactly how confident the writer is about their effectiveness, and again, it’s rather weak advice. Snoring is not a result of nasal congestion for most people! Not sure there are other ways to say this! I mean, this was a pretty tough article in general. It isn’t until the final “way to stop snoring” that GQ hits the mark, and even then, it’s fairly wishy washy:

10. If none of these things work… …and they might not, your next move is to hit up an ENT (or an otolaryngologist if you’re all fancy). He/she might suggest a dental device that pulls your jaw slightly forward forward, or a bite-device like you’d use in flag football.

ZQuietOk. Wow. Let me just say that there is no reason to see an otolaryngologist if you want to buy a mouthpiece like our recommended MAD, the ZQuiet (which we have no complaints about), or even the Good Morning Snore Solution TSD, which avoids all of the negative symptoms a jaw advancing mouthpiece can produce for some people. If you have an amazing health insurance plan and a few hours to spare, yes, you can see a specialist. But is it truly necessary for most snorers? No!

Why wait a couple of months for an appointment with an expensive specialist when you can address your problem right now? All of the most respected mouthpieces have 30 day guarantees, and are going to be cheaper than a specialist. What’s more, a solid mouthpiece can actually solve your snoring problem starting today!

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When you’re looking to overhaul the engine in your car, you’re probably not going to pick up a copy of Good Housekeeping for some guidance. Building a deck? You’ll probably want to avoid Motor Trend magazine. Looking for a good local restaurant? You ain’t going to find your answer in a copy of Men’s Health.

So yes, if you need to stop snoring sooner and not later, you’ll probably want to put down that copy of GQ. There are a lot of things that this classic publication is good at… It just so happens that solving your snoring issue is not one of those things.

Need Snoring Help? Don’t Ask GQ Find more on: The Snoring Mouthpiece Review Blog